Vital Communication

Vital Communication

The 12 Strategies of Compassionate Communication  

“Compassionate Communication”  or “Vital Communication” is an important skill that will help enhance relationships both at home and in the office.

Language shapes our behavior and the words that we use are imbued with a multitude of personal meaning. Using the right words in the right way can bring love, money, respect. Using the wrong words or even the right word spoken but in the wrong tone can lead a country to war.

Therefore we must carefully choose our speech if we want to achieve our goals and bring dreams to fruition.

Even though we  spend many years learning language, research shows that we are surprisingly incompetent when it comes to communicating with others both in the office and at home.

In the book written by Andrew Newberg and Mark Robert Waldman titled, “Words Can Change Your Brain, they propose 12 strategies that can build trust, resolve conflict, and increase intimacy.

The 12 strategies of Compassionate Communication

The first 6 strategies refer to the self, and they are to calm you whenever you are in a stressful conversation:

  1. Relax
  2. Stay Present
  3. Cultivate inner silence
  4. Increase positivity
  5. Reflect on your deepest values
  6. Access a pleasant memory

The balance 6 strategies refers to when you are talking to others:

  1. Observe nonverbal cues
  2. Express appreciation
  3. Speak warmly
  4. Speak slowly
  5. Speak briefly
  6. Listen deeply

According to the authors these 12 strategies will enhance the dynamics of any conversations, even with strangers.

After spending years teaching and learning about communication skills, I find these 12 strategies to be immensely most useful for myself and when sharing this with my clients. Many of our clients report a much-improved relationship when they use some of the strategies when talking to their own clients and also when talking to their boss.

Other clients have also reported much success when they are speaking to their spouses when they use a mixture of these strategies.

If you practice the strategies for just several minutes each day you would be clearer in your speech and you would enhance your creativity generating more authentic dialogue with others.

You could even eliminate conflicts well before they begin.

The brain scan studies have shown that in the field of language, communication, and mindfulness, these strategies can significantly improve your memory and cognition.

They can also remove stress, anxiety and irritability, common factors that are known to reduce the effectiveness of any conversation or social interaction.

The authors also say your self-confidence and satisfaction in life will grow in many ways that can be measured in the laboratory and felt at home.

If you want to learn more about these strategies, I am running Small-Group Coaching Clinics to cover these topics. You can learn how to put them into practical use to dramatically enhance your personal and professional lives.


For more information contact Ricky Lien on 65-9619 2048 or write to me at

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